Brain dead or lung full

Will catchup as soon as I get somewhat better.  Am in pure misery.  Lung filled with watrt

6 Dec 11 - Doctor today.

Stats:  WT:  149.0  Blood Pressure114/55 pulse of 90.

The morning shitz was OK as far as I'm concerned.  Took place at 0745 hours and was exceptionally thick.  Thick pudding that built upward instead of flattening out.  Anyway no complaints.

Regarding yesterdays post... I am still in pain although Aleve is taking the edge off.  Concerned what the Primary Care Physician (PCP) is going to have me do.

Last 2 days have been filled with snow... which sucks. See the pics:

Even though we are to get more snow it is gradually melting away.

Had to go to the heart doc yesterday to get both sides of my neck scanned to see if the blockages (Build up) has gotten worse or if the blood flow is being really restricted.  Will know when I see the doc in the upcoming week or so.

5 Dec 11 - Monday - Snow Day

Stats:  Weight is 149.4.  It is around 930 as I write this so I have no morning constitutional and quite a few cups of coffee plus my morning pills and Metamucil.

Had an eventful weekend.  Saturday night around 0320/0330 I woke up to pain beyond description it felt I like had stuck a red hot poker stuck in my back and far surpassed even the pain I had had during potassium IVs.
.  What first happened when I woke up I noticed my sleep mask was making a gurgling sound I figured it was because I had set the humidity level way to high and moisture condensed in the hose. The second thing was the pain.  After a great deal of effort I was able to take off the mask and slide over to the machine to shut it off.  The pain was so intense that I could not talk and only groans came out so I tried groaning to help relieve the pain.  No luck there.  For around 1/2 hour my body just shivered (like I had the chills but I was warm) and shook.  I thought I was going to shatter my teeth I was shaking so hard from the pain.  After a while the sounds I was making (grunts/groans) woke my wife up in the other bedroom she tried to help but there literally was nothing she could do ... ....  well almost nothing.  At around 4:15 came close but decided to not call an ambulance or go to the emergency room. (no heart attach symptoms or anything else I was familiar with) other than I had this same type of pain, just not so intense, Thursday/Thanksgiving Day or rather night.

We finally decide to take 2 Advil and again brought up going to the ER.  But as I lay there the body shivering and pain started to diminish.  Around 4:30 or so was like 95% pain free.  Advil made me kinda sluggish and I ended up falling asleep until 0845 and I finally able to walk.

Pain was located just below the ribcage on my left side.  Almost like what a kidney stone pain is described as.  No blood in urine doing great there.

Now when I cough or sneeze I get an immense shooting of pain up my left side until it hits/stops just below the left ear.  Been taking 1 Advil if the pain starts to get too intense.

Running out of steam .. maybe more later.

3 Dec 11 - Carl's Jr

Short one today.
Stats. Wt:  146.8 before shitz, 146.2 after.
BP was 108/46 Pulse 76

The bonus was  - - - The morning constitutional was NORMAL.  This only happens rarely.  Wish I could figure out another word for turds but the turds were about 4 inches long but NORMAL ! !  !

Had snow on the ground ths morning.  Went away by noon but still cold.  Weather reports state we are going to get another storm hitting us.  Just not a fan of snow.

Went to the mall to take advantage of some of the sales going on.  Since my waist went from 38" to 32" needed to buy some pants.  Bought a pair of black corduroy, a nice black and white  sweater vest, long sleeved shirt, and a pull over shirt.  Spent $ 60.00 and they said I saved over a $160.00 so that tells ya that they have been ripping us off all the time trying to gouge the consumer..Well thats how I feel anyway.

Had a sloppy Carl's Jr hamburger, French Fries, and a Milkshake on the way home.  Absolute heaven.

2 Dec 11 - Dead battery

Today's stats:
Weight:  146.2 after the morning shitz
BP:  105/61 Pulse 78

1st shite was at 630 AM then I weighed my self and then 1/2 later had to go again.  The first was chunky tuna and the second was the consistency of rice pudding.  Both are good.

Had to get my blood tested today for my PCP.  Yesterday afternoon I thought I would start the Mazda and lo & behold it had a dead battery.  Now ain't that the shitz! !   My fault really; I had not started the vehicle in about 2 weeks, should have figured this would happen.  Put my murdercycle's battery charger on it but by the time my wife came home it still had not charged sufficiently enough to even roll over.  So when she got home I jump started it.  Left it run for a little bit then drove it about 5 miles.  Made kinda of a circle around my house and even went past the new hospital on Unser and Westside drive.  About 9 PM I started it again and then this morning at 7 AM to ensure it would start.  Battery got a good charge in it this morning by going to the clinic, Krispy Kreme, gas station and home again.

Yeah, I took a coupon to the doughnut shop and got a coffee and a holiday 'nut.  Plus I bought a sour creme one to boot.  Bought the local newspaper and was gonna read it while having the coffee and doughnut but changed my mind.  The flippin place was packed and this is at 11AM.  Someone even had their 6 kids there.  Not to be mean but putting sugar into these kids mouth was an evil thing to do.  One of the munchkins had a perfect oval around his mouth from the icing.  She, the mother, probably could not figure out why her darlings were running around a screaming like little animals.  Needless to say but no reading was accomplished.  Ate the doughnuts and left.  Was proud of myself for not starting a confrontation although there was another gentleman who told one of the kids to leave him alone and get back to his mother.  I almost said good job.

Still wonder how long it will be before someone I know discovers this site.  Maybe more later.

1 Dec 11

Cannot believe it is the first of December already.  Time is just flying past me............

Stats this AM:
Blood Pressure first time was 101/40 did it 5 minutes later was 108/43 pulse 78.  Fairly consistent.

Weight before poop was 148.2  and after was 147.  1.2 pounds might not sound like a lot but every ounce is important to me.  So far this morning I have went to the bathroom 2 times and I weigh right now @ 0925 hrs 147.4

8 AM - Breakfast consisted of a bowl of instant oatmeal and 4 pieces of toast with butter and peanut butter.

Supposed to get a cold front in and am not looking forward to that.  I have to go out this week and get blood work done.  Hope it does not snow.

I'm getting frustrated with words with friends because I am getting my ass kicked all over the place.

30 Nov 11 - all this talk about shitz

Stats this AM:
BP 104/58 Pulse 79 (Wonder how high I can make it go if I drink some really strong coffee)

Shitz occurred 2 times so far today and it is only 0930.  Lost a pound on the first one at 0720.  I weighed 146.0 after the morning constitutional.  Had a bowl of fake/instant oatmeal 0800 then shite again at 0815.  this one was also chunks of fecal matter in a little water.  Good shitz by my reckoning.

Spent too much time on the words with friends - like I have nothing else to do... Like doing it but it just bugs me.

Figure this one out.  My sister gave me a Messianic cross which (supposedly)  is a symbol that links Jew and Gentile, the Old and New Testaments, and Judaism and Christianity.

Now, supposedly it was my Mothers or grandmothers.  Both had one and my sister that died ended up with both.  Now my problem is that if it was my grandmothers it does not make any sense.  Supposedly she was Irish and along with her first husband came over on the boat from Ireland. City of Cork/County of Cork with a last name of McDonald.  Would that make her a catholic?  When he, the upright man that he was, abandoned her and her child (children? - only knew my mother as an only child but who really knows) in St Louis she eventually met the grandfather that I know, John Micsec(k).  He, also supposedly, was from Yugoslavia/Austria.  So I could see him being Jewish and her wanting to help mesh their beliefs.  Just a strange little tale.

Sister and I talked about the family background.

I realised how much I distrusted my brothers view or memories and how colored they were.  To bad we can't have these type of conversations.  Oh well - -such is life.

Edited on 1 Dec 11

Oh well...Maybe more a little later

Tuesday the 24th of November 2011

Another morning, amazingly, I woke up.  Some stats you could care less about.

Blood Pressure today:  - 125 (Systolic)  over 93 (diastolic) with a heart rate of 81.      Took it a few minutes later and it was 102/68 HR 74.

Weight today is 147.4 before I took a shitz and that is the highest it has been since July 10th of 2010.  Wait until I start describing them-you will be in for a treat because the is no medical terminology I can find to describe the many variations of stools. 

Saw Dylan Dog: Dead of Night yesterday. Its the adventures of supernatural private eye, Dylan Dog, who seeks out the monsters of the Louisiana bayou in his signature red shirt, black jacket, and blue jeans.
Wasn't bad but nowhere near as it could have been. I really have become jaded..
More later maybe.. 

I'm surprised I've done this for two days in a row and wonder how long it will be before a family member finds this  (I know I not write any really mean stuff but I wanted to especially since my youngest (full blood) sister' death..  I've had the feeling I should go back through my old posts and remove any truly mean stuff.  I'll have to think about it.

Don't know if I said anything before but I am now playing "words with friends" via Facebook.  My sister, my brother-in-law, and a friend from Ca. 

This is gonna not sound nice but I hope I do not get anymore invitations to play.  At one time in my life I could of given a rats ass if I hurt someones feelings.  For some reason now I care.  I guess a shrink would have fun with that. Maybe dying has something to do with it.

Monday, the 28th of November

Well... "I" had a wonderful time with the sister, brother-in-law, and 3 kids here.  I originally thought that the sound levels would kill me but guess what?  I adapted well with only one time the doggy got to me.  Had friends come over and he just yapped and yapped and I just yelled.  Funny but the whole house got quiet and everything was good.  Guess when I yelled it released my tension.

Literally ate myself into a daze.  Was really worried that eating that much food would give me a terrible case of the diarrhea but that did not happen.  Just my normal loose watery shitz.

Heck here is a summary:
19th - Went to the bathroom 11 times - ain't that the shitz! ! !
20th - 5 times
21st - 3 times
22nd - 3 or 4 times
23rd - 4 times
24th - 8 times but I got to say it was not as bad as it looks on paper.  All the stools were thick like applesauce and/or pudding ( agood thing)
25th - 6 times
26th - 4 times
27th - 4 times.
28th - today - so far have only went once at 8 AMand it was chunks and heavily colored thick water.

Weight before I went shitz was 147.2 weight after was 146.2.  So far today I have ate only a bowl of oatmeal and a poppy seed muffin.

Also got really envious of the I-Pads my sis and bil had.  From what my wife tells we cannot afford one because I'm retired.  I guess I should have just not have had this money problem -removed because derogatory about being so poor since I retired. Oh well such is life.

Not much.."The Blessing of the Thorns"

Really not much to say.  REALLY glad my youngest sister, her husband and their 3 kids are coming to visit us over Thanksgiving.  With as much has happened to our family over the last 15 months it is a good "thing"! ! !

I'll even add this mushy story because it seem so apropos:


"The Blessing of the Thorns"
  
Sandra felt as low as the heels on her shoes as she pushed against a November gust and opened the florist shop door. Her life had been easy, like a spring breeze. Then, in the fourth month of her second pregnancy, a minor automobile accident stole her ease.

During this Thanksgiving week, she would have delivered a son. She grieved over her loss. As if that weren’t enough, her husband’s company threatened a transfer. Then, her sister, whose annual holiday visit she coveted, called to say she could not come.

What was worse, Sandra’s friend infuriated her by suggesting her grief was a God-given path to maturity that would allow her to empathize with others who suffer.

She has no idea what I’m feeling. “Thanksgiving? Thankful for what?” she wondered aloud. For a careless driver whose truck was hardly scratched when he rear-ended her? For an airbag that saved her life but took that of her child?

“Good afternoon, can I help you?”

“I....I need an arrangement,” stammered Sandra, “for Thanksgiving.”

“Do you want beautiful but ordinary, or would you like to challenge the day with a customer favorite I call the Thanksgiving Special?” asked the shop clerk. “I’m convinced that flowers tell stories. Are you looking for something that conveys gratitude this Thanksgiving?”

“Not exactly!” Sandra blurted out. “In the last five months, everything that could go wrong has gone wrong.”

Sandra regretted her outburst and was surprised when the shop clerk said, “I have the perfect arrangement for you.”

The door’s small bell rang, and the shop clerk said, “Hi, Barbara...let me get your order.” She politely excused herself and walked toward a small workroom, then quickly reappeared, carrying an arrangement of greenery, bows, and long-stemmed thorny roses.

Except the ends of the rose stems were neatly snipped...there were no flowers.

“Want this in a box?” asked the clerk.

Sandra watched for the customer’s response. Was this a joke? Who would want rose stems with no flowers? She waited for laughter but neither woman laughed.

“Yes, please,” Barbara replied with an appreciative smile. “You’d think after three years of getting the special, I wouldn't be so moved by its significance, but I can feel it right here, all over again,” she said, as she gently tapped her chest. She thanked the clerk and left.

“Uhh...” stammered Sandra, “that lady just left with, uhh...no flowers!”

“Right. I cut off the flowers. That’s the Special. I call it the Thanksgiving Thorns Bouquet.”

“Oh, come on, you can’t tell me someone is willing to pay for that?” exclaimed Sandra.

“Barbara came into the shop three years ago feeling very much like you feel today. She thought she had very little to be thankful for. She had lost her father to cancer, the family business was failing, her son was into drugs, and she was facing major surgery.”

“That same year I had lost my husband,” continued the clerk, “and for the first time in my life, I had to spend the holidays alone. I had no children, no husband, no family nearby, and too great a debt to allow any travel.”

“So, what did you do?” asked Sandra.

“I learned to be thankful for thorns,” answered the clerk quietly. “I’ve always thanked God for good things in life and never thought to ask Him why those good things happened to me, but when bad stuff hit, did I ever ask! It took time for me to learn that dark times are important. I always enjoyed the “flowers” of life, but it took “thorns” to show me the beauty of God’s comfort. You know, the Bible says that God comforts us when we’re afflicted, and from His consolation we learn to comfort others.”

Sandra sucked in her breath as she thought about the very thing her friend had tried to tell her. “I guess the truth is I don’t want comfort. I’ve lost a baby and I’m angry with God.”

Just then someone else walked in the shop.

“Hey, Phil!” shouted the clerk to the balding, rotund man.

“My wife sent me in to get our usual Thanksgiving arrangement...twelve thorny, long-stemmed stems!” laughed Phil as the clerk handed him a tissue-wrapped arrangement from the refrigerator.

“Are those for your wife?” asked Sandra incredulously. “Do you mind me asking why she wants something that looks like that?”

“No...I’m glad you asked,” Phil replied. “Four years ago, my wife and I nearly divorced. After forty years, we were in a real mess, but with the Lord’s grace and guidance, we slogged through problem after problem. He rescued our marriage. Jenny here told me she kept a vase of rose stems to remind her of what she learned from “thorny” times and that was good enough for me. I took home some of those stems. My wife and I decided to label each one for a specific problem and give thanks to Him for what that problem taught us.”

As Phil paid the clerk, he said to Sandra, “I highly recommend the special!”

“I don’t know if I can be thankful for the thorns in my life.” Sandra said to the clerk. “It’s all too...fresh.”

“Well, my experience has shown me that thorns make roses more precious. We treasure God’s providential care more during trouble than at any other time. Remember, it was a crown of thorns that Jesus wore so we might know His love. Don’t resent the thorns.”

Tears rolled down Sandra’s cheeks. For the first time since the accident, she loosened her grip on resentment. “I'll take those twelve long-stemmed thorns, please,” she managed to choke out.

“I hoped you would,” said the clerk gently. “I'll have them ready in a minute.”

“Thank you. What do I owe you?” asked Sandra.

“Nothing.” said the clerk. “Nothing but a promise to allow God to heal your heart. The first year’s arrangement is always on me.” She smiled and handed a card to Sandra.

“I'll attach this card to your arrangement, but maybe you’d like to read it first.”

Sandra took the card and read, “Dear God, I have never thanked You for my thorns. I have thanked You a thousand times for my roses, but never once for my thorns. Teach me the glory of the cross I bear; teach me the value of my thorns. Show me that I have climbed closer to you along the path of pain. Show me that, through my tears, the colors of your rainbow look much more brilliant. ~George Matheson”

Jenny said, “Happy Thanksgiving, Sandra,” handing her the special. “I look forward to knowing each other better.”

Sandra smiled. She turned, opened the door, and walked toward hope.

Praise Him for the roses; thank Him for the thorns. God bless all of you. Be thankful for all that the Lord does for you.

*the author of this piece is unknown

Normal??

Had a normal looking, and feeling, bowel movement.  I know - - gross huh?  So one out of a 100 makes me feel good and gives me further hope.

Saw the cancer/blood doc yesterday.  Wants me to try an iron elixir instead of pills before we go to infusing me.  Hope the liquid works.

Low on Vit min D and PCP wants me to start taking 2 50K units a week.

Wished they would have been able to let me have at least 2 more feet of intestine and maybe I would not be so anemic.  Yeah I know deal with what I got.

been two weeks

Been about two weeks since I wrote anything here.  Have the time, have the energy but, just plain and simple, I just get lazy.

Been struggling with going to the bathroom a little too often and then  - - wham - -  I'm only going twice a day making me almost normal.  Wish there was a way to figure out why my body goes crazy and then kinda rights itself.

Missing out on a few things but it doesn't matter.

Saw the following movies:

*** - Carved: The Slit Mouthed Woman - 2007 - NetFlix gave it 2 out of 5  I give it a 3.

*** - Himalaya, 1999, NetFlix gives it a 3 out of five but I would give it a 4+.
From the IMDB - - An aging chief's last stand, lessons for the new, and the education of a young chief-to-be played against harsh Nature in Nepal's Dolpo. When his son dies returning from Tibet's salt lakes, Tinle blames Karma, his son's friend, refuses to give Karma his blessing as the new chief, and organizes a rival caravan to take the salt to lower Nepal to trade for grain.

Really rally good but given every ones appetite for the wham bam thank you ma'am type of movies most would not like it at all.  Oh well their loss.

*** - Premonition - 2004 - From the IMDB wesite:  While stopped at a roadside phone boot for transmitting his work through Internet to the university, Professor Hideki Satomi finds a scrap of newspaper with the picture of his five years old daughter Nana in the obituary. He sees his wife Ayaka Satomi trying to release their daughter from the seat-belt, when a truck without steer hits his car killing Nana. Three years later, Hideki is divorced from Ayaka, who is researching paranormal persons who claim to have read an evil newspaper anticipating the future still trying to believe on Hideki, and she finds that there are people cursed to foresee the future but without power to save the victims. When Hideki changes the future saving Ayaka, he becomes trapped in hell and he has to make a choice of his own destiny. Written by Claudio Carvalho, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

Another really good horror story.  Must be able to read though.

*** - Face - Korean 2004 - Lee Hyun-min, who works reconstructing faces from skull, quits his work in a institute to stay with his Beta-allergic daughter Jin that was submitted to a transplant of heart by the specialist Dr. Yoon.

This is a really really good horror flick I mean really good ! ! !

*** - Ghost of Mae Nak.  A young couple reawaken the spirit of a famous old Thai legend.  It's OK but what I thought was funny was the sub titles.  Filmed in Thailand and in English, it was dubbed into Thai and then subtitles in English were added.  Too funny.

*** - Speed of Thought - -Joshua Lazarus has a special gift -- but will this gift destroy him before he can escape to freedom with his newly found soul mate? 

 Most won't like it but being the sci-fi guy that I am ... really good.. I give it a 4 out of 5.

Friday - 7 October 2011

 Coumadin level from yesterday was 2.9.  Coumadin doctor thought it was OK and I don’t have to go back for another check for 4 weeks this time.  Told her about the weight loss Sunday night via all the water that got pooped out and how bad my body felt all Monday with the body ache.  She thought it might have dehydration and now that I think of it she could very well be correct because Tuesday morning I felt OK.

Been raining all morning and COLD.  There will no special shape balloons going up this morning.  Matter of fact the sun has only shined for about 10 minutes around 10:30 this AM.  God but I hate cold weather.

Watched another movie this morning called:

……The Heirloom – 2005 -Horror

     A Taiwanese man returns to the island after years abroad when he inherits a house; when he and his fiancé move in, strange things start to happen.

   Geez but I don’t know why I like foreign films.  Maybe because they take more time fleshing out the characters and story but this was another really good horror story.  NetFlix gives it a 2.5 out of five where I would have given it a 3.5 out of 5.

Saw 3 movies yesterday.

Devil’s Den – 2006 - Horror

    Two small time drug-dealers cross paths with a female-assassin, a monster hunter, a Japanese swordsman and even the Devil himself at a gentlemen's club housing murderous she-demons.

……NetFlix gives it a 1.5 out of 5 but for what it is ( a B movie) it is worth more than that.  Good rainy day filler.

The Feeding – 2006 - Horror

    High in the Appalachian Mountains and under a full moon, a timeless evil rises. An awakened predator whose savagery and ferocity are matched only by its insatiable appetite. Consumed by its legendary bloodlust, the creature begins the hunt for its oldest and most dangerous prey: Man.

……NetFlix gives it a 1.5 out of 5 and it is not worth a half star out of 5.  Stopped watching after 10 minutes and that is saying something for even me…Ugh

Blood trails - -2007 - Horror

    Bike messenger Anne never imagined the horrific events that would unfold after her one-night-stand with stranger Chris.

NetFlix gives it a 1.5 out of 5 but that is way off target.  This is a cool horror movie and, of course, I liked it a lot.. heck maybe even 4 stars.

Friday 7 Oct 2011

 Coumadin level from yesterday was 2.9.  Coumadin doctor thought it was OK and I don’t have to go back for 4 weeks this time.  Told her about the weight loss Sunday night via all the water that got pooped out and how bad my body felt all Monday with the body ache.  She thought it might have dehydration and now that I think about it she could very well be correct.  Tuesday morning I felt OK.

Been raining all morning and COLD.  There will no special shape balloons going up this morning.  Matter of fact the sun has only shined for about 10 minutes around 10:30 this AM.  God but I hate cold weather.

Watched another movie this morning called:
……The Heirloom – 2005 -Horror
     A Taiwanese man returns to the island after years abroad when he inherits a house; when he and his fiancé move in, strange things start to happen.
   Geez but I don’t know why I like foreign films.  Maybe because they take more time fleshing out the characters and story but this was another really good horror story.  NetFlix gives it a 2.5 out of five where I would have given it an easy 3.5 out of 5.

Saw 3 movies yesterday.

Devil’s Den – 2006 - Horror
....Two small time drug-dealers cross paths with a female-assassin, a monster hunter, a Japanese swordsman and even the Devil himself at a gentlemen's club housing murderous she-demons.
……NetFlix gives it a 1.5 out of 5 but for what it is ( a B movie) it is worth more than that.  Good rainy day filler.

The Feeding – 2006 - Horror
....High in the Appalachian Mountains and under a full moon, a timeless evil rises. An awakened predator whose savagery and ferocity are matched only by its insatiable appetite. Consumed by its legendary bloodlust, the creature begins the hunt for its oldest and most dangerous prey: Man.

……NetFlix gives it a 1.5 out of 5 and it is not worth a half star out of 5.  Stopped watching after 10 minutes and that is saying something for even me…Ugh

Blood trails - -2007 - Horror

....Bike messenger Anne never imagined the horrific events that would unfold after her one-night-stand with stranger Chris.

....NetFlix gives it a 1.5 out of 5 but that is way off target.  This is a cool horror movie and, of course, I liked it a lot.. heck maybe even 4 stars.

6 Oct 2011 - - #2

     Coumadin appointment today at 4 PM.  Wonder what it will be.  Did a little work in the garage.  Mainly trashing stuff.  As I told my wife, basically I'm erasing who I am while I'm still alive with everything that I throw away or run through the shredder.  It hurts.
      Like today I got rid of the face page of the first contract I signed as a Contracting Officer for the Air Force.

************************************************************

     Just finished watching Wolf Moon, also known as Dark Moon Rising. 2009 - http://www.darkmoonrisingmovie.com/
 - Small-town girl meets mysterious drifter boy, they fall in love. Only in this case, the boy brings with him a family curse and unimaginable horror that rains hell upon the small town.

Hey this was a good little werewolf picture  was really surprised by that.  It also had a killer 1968 AMX in it...neat.  NetFlix gave it 2 out of 5 stars .. sheesh I give it an easy 3.

6 Oct 2011 #1

Weight at 0700 hours was 146.8 - - - Weight at 0705 hours was 144.4
What a difference the morning bowel movement makes... just can never get over it. Oh well.

Saw 2 movies yesterday.

1st one: Damage with Stone Cold Steve Austin. An ex-con battles it out in the cage to pay for the operation that would save the daughter of his victim. Along the way he finds fatherly love, and friendship, in the most unlikely of places.
Net Flix gave it a 2.7 out of 5 and I'll go along with that. Not the worlds best kinda clunky. good for a time killer.
**************************************************************
2nd one was Black Swarm.

Done in 2007 for TV The widow, Deputy Sheriff Jane Kozik, moves from Manhattan to Black Stone, New York, with her daughter Kelsey Kozik. There she expects to find a safe place to live. The day after moving, a homeless man is found dead in the tool shed of Jane's blind friend Beverly Rowe. Devin Hall and the entomologist Katherine Randell are summoned to help with the investigation. Devin is Jane's brother-in-law and former boyfriend, and Jane still has a crush on him. Meanwhile, Kelsey befriends the scientist Eli Giles, who has developed genetically modified wasps to the army as a weapon, and now he is trying to revert the process. When the wasps attack Black Stone, Jane, Devin and Eli team-up to attempt to destroy the swarm.

Netflix gives it 2 out of 5 stars and I agree. Kinda neat twist about the zombies.

Left in Darkness - 2006 & Trapped Ashes - 2006

Gist of the movie #1:

A young woman, whose mother died giving birth to her, is facing eternal life in either Heaven or Hell. She must make the choice who to listen to, her guardian angel, whom she met when she was a child, or the evil ones.

Netflix gives it 2 stars and I will agree with that.  Takes a long time to go no  where.

*************************************************************

Gist of movie #2:
Seven strangers on a Hollywood movie studio tour are trapped inside a House of Horror and forced to tell their most terrifying stories to get out alive.
Net Flix gives it 2 stars and I'll give it a one star.  Gotta be a new (or old) low for John Saxon.   Sooooooooo stoopid even by my low standards.

Errata ?

Today is our 37th wedding anniversary.  Who woulda thunk it!  Probably do nothing as usual/normal.  Probably go to 5 Guy's Burger joint his weekend.

Rained like crazy yesterday and most of last night.  Made for a chilly morning.  The valley below us was filled with fog for about 20 minutes and then it disappeared as quickly as it showed up.  Wished I could of caught it with the camera but didn't think quick enough.... Oh well was truly an unusual sight.

After the echo gram yesterday and before I picked up the dog from the groomers I treated my self to 2 Krispy Kreme doughnuts and coffee.

Had a echo sonogram performed yesterday and the only portion I cared about was the ejection fraction (EF).  The EF in October, while in the emergency room, was down to 15% so today it is a little over 40 %.  Gotta luv medications that work and a lotta luck ! ! !

Daughter sent a picture of our granddaughter which I thought was cute.

 Not sure on how she got that effect - probably with the camera's built in software - not sure -  but I think it is cool.

Maybe add stuff later.  I just happy I did this 2 days in a row ! !  ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Quick weight loss

Before I get to the weight loss.....
Had  a meeting with my new primary physician.  Supposed to be only 40 minutes but we went well beyond that time constraint.  Am not easily impressed with doctor's primarily because of the "beneath the surface" arrogance they had the tendency to show.  Anyway, not only do I like her but the first thing she targeted was the malnutrition issue.  With only 6 foot/feet of small intestine I just don't get the absorption most normals get.

   Started sub-lingual vitamin D and B-12 and liquid vitamins (not quite a yuck but close)

An example of the stuff I take 4 times a day.

• Vitamin D - 50,000. units - 1 capsule once a week but am now starting to supplement that with Vitamin D3 at 5000 IU 2 times a day.
• Potassium chloride SA (Klor Con)   2 @ 2 times a day.
• Coreg - 400 mg 1 @ 2 times a day
• Magnesium Chloride 2 Tabs 3 times a day
• Vitamin B12 - she gave me a shot while in her office and am now, in addition,  doing B-12 dots sub-lingual twice a day.
• Ferrous Gluconate - 480 mg 3 times a day
• Lomotil -5 mg 2 pills 4 times a day.
• Codiene Sulphate - 4 times a day 30mg
• Lisinopril - 1 2.5 mg tablet a day
• Aspirin 81 mg once a day
• Multi Vitamin once daily
• Liquid vitamins - once a day
• Vitamin B Complex by mouth daily
• Lipitor - 10 mg once a day.
• Warfarin mouth daily as directed
• Vitamin K oral at bedtime
• Coreg 3.125 mg 1 by mouth 2 times a day
• Cyanocbalamin 1000 mg injection once a month

Plus there are a few others but I think one gets the gist of it. I know some folks have it a lot rougher than I do and take double or triple the amount of pills I take and I can truly sympathise with them! ! !

  Gotta take the doggy to the groomer today and then  my neck sonogram taken.

     Anyway what I really started to put down was how much weight I lost the other night.  I weighed in at 147.5 but went to the bathroom so many times that night, until 9 the next morning,  my weight went down to 143.8.  It was all water with very little solids.  Made for a tough night.  So yesterday my body ached so bad that I went back to bed just a little after 9 and stayed there until about 1:45 in the afternoon then realized I really had to get up.  Get up I did but my body hurt so bad it was  like if someone beat me with a baseball bat.

    Today I feel better fer sure.  No breakfast or lunch today because I have to do the running around.  Now 11 am and I am hungry ! !  ! !

Balloon Fiesta is going on...

Weight tracker

Seeing if it will work.... 

Eventually

I guess, eventually, I'll need to make a decision on whether to end this poor attempt at a blog or do it right.

Maybe do my opinion on the movies that I watch.  See at least 2 every day with a thank you to NetFlix fer sure..

Once again,.,.,. Nothing to say

think I would have a lot to say since my youngest full blood sister died latter part of June.  Is  a shame.

Weiner is a weiner

How the arrogant fall........ what a dipshit ! !  !

Rambling

It is amazing that I don't write more often considering how sick I am some days and the fact that I'm a BS'r.  Have a coumadin appointment today - 2 weeks ago I was at 2.2 which is considered good.  Bowel movements, since taking the codeine sulphate, have mostly normalized which in turn has caused my blood thinner to stabilize.  Normalized means I'm not going to the bathroom every 60 minutes and is now stretched out to every 3 or 4 hours.  Hopefully it will keep getting better over time and soon I will be able to ride my beloved Heritage Springer once again.

Thursday the 12th of May

Not much to say.  Saw the coumadin doc yesterday and had a reading of 2.2.  Good enough so that I don't have to see her for another two weeks.  Have a GI doc appointment tomorrow.

Will try and see if I can do any yard work today but I might not.  Having some stomach pain but it seems to be going away..

Geronimo

Geronimo, Geronimo, Geronimo, Geronimo, Geronimo, Geronimo


There you stupid shits... 

Tuesday the 3rd of May

weighed 142.6 lbs (10.21 stone, 64.8 kilo) this AM.

Brother and his wife stayed with us on Sunday night as a layover on the way to Ohio.  After 20 years in Phoenix they are moving back home so that they might be around the grandkids.  Envy them.

I just wonder if it will be the last time I ever see them.  I hope not but I did shed a few tears when they left.  Just being a Donny Downer...

Watched the movie "Machete" this morning... Ho Hum.

Potted around outside, sprayed for weeds and few other things.

Lots to say but:

Really don't feel like saying much.  Found an old friend on FaceBook.  Coumadin was at 3.4 level yesterday.....tad high.

Trying to do the yard work.  what would take me 2-3 hours now takes me 2 days without any beer.  Which reminds me... I have not had any alcohol since 09 July 2010 the day I fell down and played dead.  Hopefully, when I truly get stabalized, I can have me a few Coronas.

Still here

Still here but just haven't felt saying anything worthwhile.

Makes me smile

Don't know exactly why but this always makes me smile.

Been a week

Been a week or so since last posting but last week had a a pretty nice day.  Took the dog to the groomer and once I picked him up decided to (just for the heck of it) take him to a doggy park several miles from the house.  I don't know if it was more fun for him or myself but he was kinda afraid of some of the smaller larger dogs.  Probably need to take him more than once n a while for the socialization aspects of it.  Besides a bottle of water I took the Kindle also but never did get a chance to start reading.  Met a lady with 2 standard schnauzers an boy were they full of pep and zest.  Supposedly there is another dog park in Rio Rancho but have not checked it out.  Tomorrow I have to get blood drawn again but am not going to do it at the cancer center.  Ran it thorough the blood docs nurse, after telling her I would never get my blood drawn at her facility ever again, so she ensured I am in the system and can get it drawn in the Pres facility in Rio rancho.

Felt like an adult saturday night.  Had friends over for dinner and ended up a nice evening.

5 April

Yesterday had an echo done on heart.  Today to get the results.  Small bit of info.  On the first part of October last year my  ejection fraction was at 35% but on the latter part of October last year, after being in the emergency room for low electrolytes, my ejection fraction sank to 20%.  Hopefully today the heart doc will say it is a little higher.  The higher it gets the better chance they will work on the unblocking the femoral  caused but the last operation for the short bowel.
Also had blood drawn today and damned if I did not get the same butcher as before and darned if she did not whack me again.  It will be the last time I get my blood drawn at the cancer center.

3 April

Day started off fairly well.  Got out and went to Sam's club to pick up items including my beloved mexican coke.  Also pick up a pair of shorts with a 32" waist.  Far cry from the 36"-38" waists I used to wear. 

As a treat before heading home stopped in Subway and got a cold cut 6" sandwich.  Had mayo and pickle on it and ended up with a reaction.  Made the reaction worse by attempting to spread fertilizer on the yards and I must have twisted or stressed my insides. Diarrhea came back.  Ok this morning.

April Fools day

Nothing special to talk about with one exception.  For breakfast I had cereal which means I had 1% milk with it.  Will see how my body reacts to it.  If a reaction then I will take a lactaid pill or two and try it again.  Am actually hoping I don't have an adverse reaction to the milk.

Good/bad day? - 31 Mar 11

Yesterday was an unusual day for me.  Finally was able to attend my own gong away/retirement luncheon.  Held at Kelly's Bar in Nob Hill I was surprised at the amount of folks that showed up.  Practically the whole directorate.  Without any sarcasm it was heartwarming.

But then, my wife has me drive her to my coumadin appointment.  I passed the driving test and am now allowed to drive a vehicle once again.  We will leave it there.

Coumadin was at 3.1 so doc decided not to change anything and see what it will be in 2 weeks. Small victory.

Short tempered

Yesterday was a bad day...And leave it at that

GI Doc...

Been too lazy to post.  Went to GI doc on Friday.  Still the same bedside manner but no big deal.  Changed the type of probiotic I'm using.  He emphatically stated what I was using was worthless.  Good enough for me.

Told him that I have had 6 out of 9 days in where I have went to the bathroom 5 times or less during the day, he seemed to like that.  All due to the change of narcotic (codeine Sulfate) and Lomotril.  Picked up an iron supplement at Pharmica  (Culturelle)on his suggestion, hopefully it will digest and be absorbed much quicker into my system.

He will now see me in two months.  Which is OK.  Since, once again, it will be another year and a half before I approach some resemblance of normality.

Ended up going to the mall and bought 2 new shirts and a pair of Levis.  Funny but a 32" waist is now my size, instead of 36-38" prior to the operations.  In reality I think a small would be OK for the shirts but the wife said the medium looked good.

Then ended the day up by going to  Subway and having a soda and some kind of cold cut sandwhich, which by the way was heavenly.  Had olives on my side of the 12 incher and sure enough 3.5 hours later they went right though me.  Still did not detract form being able to somewhat normal for a while.

Enough for now.

Not a happy camper today

Damn sure not in a good mood today.  Again up most of the with gurgling intestines then dealing with a butcher this am draing blood and then on top of that I find out that I am going to have to have an iron infusion.......  This crap never ends.

Tuesday the 22nd

Had a decent night, up and in the bathroom at 1:30 AM.  Since starting the Lomotil and a different narcotic the bowel movements have drastically changed. Am starting to become more secure in knowing that I have time to get to the bathroom once the pressure starts.  Instead of going to the bathroom 12 to 15 times a day I'm now down to 5 or 6, a major improvement on just a month ago.

A picture of my buddy (who is now sitting on my lap as I type this.)

Miserable Sunday night

Once again had a rotten night.  Woke up about 2:15 AM, sour stomach, intestines gurgling beyond belief, finally went to the bathroom at 2:30 and tried to eliminate as much as possible.  Damn near threw up.  Didn't work.  Took a Zantac 150, didn't help.  Ended up just sitting up in bed until around 4:30.  Slept until 6:30.  Now 8:05 and stomach/intestines still gurgling like mad.  Tried to research on the 'net but to no avail.  Screw Web MD and all the other sites.  Unless you have a "popular" disease or problem you are screwed.  Gonna try and take a nap.

Sunday-not much to say

Spent yesterday, Saturday, trying to see if I can still do yard work.  Flat wore my butt out.  Did de-thatching, running the lawn mower, hooking up water, etc etc.  Now this stuff sounds easy but when one goes from a big strapping guy to a walking corpse in less than 6 months it does present a problem.
  Lost a smidgen over 70 pounds and damn near all my muscle.

Slept for almost 10 hours....sheesh.

Chicken Fried steak

Well, the primary care doctor's appointment went off well. We discussed the low iron and she will speak with the blood doc once again and let me know if I really need to go see him.  (See bottom)

On the way home stopped at the Village Inn for dinner.  My wife, as typical, had a salad.  I, on the other hand, had Chicken Fried Steak, Tomato/basil soup and mashed potatoes. This might have contributed to the horrible night I had because of the dairy products involved.

Went to bed at 9PM, out like a log, and woke up at 11:15 PM with my intestines gurgling beyond belief, pressure so bad I did not think I was going to make it to the bathroom.  I did but it was all water.  Went back to bed and fell asleep immediately.

Woke up once again at 2:15 AM with the same symptoms.  But the pressure would come and go.  I tried to out last it but had to go to the bathroom at 2:30 AM., then could not go back to sleep until almost 3 AM.  Intestines continued to gurgle so loud at times I'm surprised my wife didn't hear it in the next room. 

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention but after coming home from the hospital we found out that if she was going to get any type of quality of sleep she would have to sleep in another bedroom so that is happening.  Been married for 36+ years and always slept together.  Kinda sucks but I get it and to be honest am getting used to it. 

Woke up a little before 7 AM and a 7:30 AM had breakfast of Chicken noodle soup.  Did not go to the bathroom again until 10:45 which is kind of a long time since the last one [2:30 am].  Still tired.

Damn... just got off the phone with the PCP nurse.  They went ahead and are setting me up for an IV transfusion for the low iron.  Damn... Damn..  They say it will give me more energy.. why the hell do I need more energy to sit on my ass and do nothing.  Called the wife since she has the appointment book and dumped it on her to call and make the appt.

Coumadin clinic and other thoughts

Went to coumadin doc yesterday.  For the second week in a row I have been at 2.5......A minor miracle.  Now stretching it out to 2 week period and see what happens.

This afternoon have to see my primary care doc... she is allotted 40 minutes to talk to me and make whatever decisions she needs to make.  I have the un-pleasure of telling her I've cancelled the hematologists appointment and see what develops.  My iron levels are low, nothing new there, but with this last blood test I must have dipped a little lower than normal.  I'm gonna see if I can't correct it with a further change in diet.

Thinking about my stuff yesterday I realized that I went to sleep on July 9th, 2010 and did not wake up until almost 3 weeks and 3 operations later.  Have no idea, other than what has been relayed to me by my family, of what happened.  I can't imagine the grief my wife went through during that time, let alone the rest of the family.  What I do know is that they prepped for my death based upon the doctor's prognosis.  When I finally came home my home was not my home.  Some of the items accomplished I am grateful for since I still don't have my strength totally back and not able to do.  Some stuff like totally redecorating in preparation for the sale of the house just sucked.  We still have not returned the house to as it was before me falling down and playing dead.

Today started on Codeine Sulfate and Creon.  Stopped using Vicodin which I had been using to slow down bowel motility.  Crapping ones brains out is no fun at all. 

More about me

Originally from NE Ohio small town named Kinsman.  1900 people at the most?

Was a Federal Civil Servant working for the Air Force Research Laboratory at Kirtland AFB, NM as a Procurement Analyst until 7 jan 2011.  Prior to being here was stationed/worked at Anderson AFB in Guam, Vandenberg AFB in California, Bergstrom AFB in Texas, and a few other places (non-govt) in northeast Ohio.

Been an Air Reserve Technician teaching munitions to AF reservists.  Lord how I wish I was more mature in those days but a lot of times ammo troops just don't seem to have it all together until later in life. I guess we all have regrets in one form or another.

What is SBS you might ask........

Your small intestine is the longest part of your digestive system—about twenty feet long! It connects your stomach to your large intestine (or colon) and folds many times to fit inside your abdomen. Your small intestine does most of the digesting of the foods you eat. It has three areas called the duodenum, the ileum, and the jYour small intestine is the longest part of your digestive system—about twenty feet long! It connects your stomach to your large intestine (or colon) and folds many times to fit inside your abdomen. Your small intestine does most of the digesting of the foods you eat. It has three areas called the duodenum, the ileum, and the jejunum.


Short bowel syndrome, aka Short Gut Syndrome, (SBS) is a condition in which nutrients are not properly absorbed (malabsorption) due to severe intestinal disease or the surgical removal of a large portion of the small intestine.

SBS is a group of problems related to poor absorption of nutrients that typically occurs in people who have had half or more of their small intestine removed. The small intestine and the large intestine, also called the colon, make up the bowel. The small intestine is where most digestion of food and absorption of nutrients occur. People with short bowel syndrome cannot absorb enough water, vitamins, and other nutrients from food to sustain life.

The bowel is made up of the small and large intestines. The small intestine includes three sections—the duodenum, jejunum, and ileum.  Never have been clear on what was taken out of me.  But I do know that I have approximately 6 feet of small intestine left.

Diarrhea is the main symptom of short bowel syndrome. Diarrhea can lead to dehydration, malnutrition, and weight loss. These problems can be severe and can cause death without proper treatment.


Specific nutrient deficiencies may occur depending on what sections of the small intestine were removed or are not functioning properly. Sites of nutrient absorption in the small intestine are

• the duodenum, the first section of the small intestine, where iron is absorbed and where I have a lot of problems.

• the jejunum, the middle section of the small intestine, where carbohydrates, proteins, fat, and vitamins are absorbed

• the ileum, the last section of the small intestine, where bile acids and vitamin B12 are absorbed.

How is short bowel syndrome treated?  Time only time will take care of this.  At least that is what I get told over and over ad nausiem.

The main treatment for short bowel syndrome is nutritional support. Treatment may involve use of oral rehydration solutions, parenteral nutrition, enteral nutrition, and medications. Oral rehydration solutions consist of sugar  (Ahhhh mexican coke sold in Sam's club-I'm hooked!!) and salt liquids. Parenteral nutrition delivers fluids, electrolytes, and liquid nutrients into the bloodstream intravenously—through a tube placed in a vein. Enteral nutrition delivers liquid food to the stomach or small intestine through a feeding tube.

Specific treatment depends on the severity of the disease:

• Mild short bowel syndrome treatment involves eating small, frequent meals; taking fluid and nutritional supplements; and using medications to treat diarrhea.

• Moderate short bowel syndrome treatment is similar to that for mild disease with the addition of intravenous fluid and electrolyte supplements as needed.

• Severe short bowel syndrome treatment involves use of parenteral nutrition and oral rehydration solutions. Patients may receive enteral nutrition or continue normal eating even though most of the nutrients are not absorbed. Both enteral nutrition and normal eating stimulate the remaining intestine to function better and may allow patients to discontinue parenteral nutrition. Some people with severe short bowel syndrome require parenteral nutrition indefinitely.

What is intestinal adaptation?

After removal of a large portion of the small intestine, the remaining small intestine goes through a process of adaptation that increases its ability to absorb nutrients. The inner lining grows, increasing its absorptive surface area. Intestinal adaptation can take up to 2 years to occur. Researchers are studying intestinal adaptation and ways to help the remaining small intestine adapt more quickly and function better.
http://vsearch.nlm.nih.gov/vivisimo/cgi-bin/query-meta?v%3Aproject=medlineplus&query=short+bowel&x=17&y=16

http://www.oley.org/lifeline/Dietary_Management_SBS.html

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/

www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/000237.htm

A first attempt.

Am not a gifted writer, don't pretend to be.

Since I have a lot of time on my hands, I figured on creating an area to vent some of my anger and anguish. Maybe even an attempt to explain, to myself, the feeling of hopelessness I have on ever feeling "normal" again.

I thought what better place than in public (so to speak) knowing that no one, or maybe just a few anonymous folks, will ever really see it.